Chapter One

I thought it would be fun to tell you about some of the goofy stuff the boys do as if it were an actual Children's story... Can you tell what and who I've been reading to the boys at bedtime this week?

Chapter One

In which Elliott learns a recipe for stew from Fergus the Slightly Smelly Basset Hound and shares it with his Father.

After feeling a familiar but not quite precise rumbling somewhere between his head and toes, Elliot sprang up from the floor.  First he decided he needed to use the potty.  When the rumbling continued, he decided that he must need something to eat.


"All of this work as an engineer and conductor and trying to turn matchbox cars and toy tucks and wooden blocks into a proper train is very difficult.  One can work up quite an appetite trying to turn them into a proper train" he said to himself and anyone else near by, which was all of us.


Being a toddler of the Independent Sort, he decided that the thing to do was to make something for himself to eat and so he went to the kitchen to gather the neccesary tools and ingedients.  On the way to the kitchen, he stepped on Fergus's tail, rousing the Slightly Smelly Basset Hound from his third nap of the morning.


"Fergus" said Elliott, "Since you are awake, perhaps you could come with me to the kitchen in order to make something to eat and relieve the rumbling I feel somewhere between my head and my toes.  I know that you are a Basset Hound with very refined tastes, and I am confident that we can put your keen senses to work."


Fergus, wide awake now and turning round to see why his tail should be hurting replied with a snuffly sort of basset snort.  "Well Elliott, it appears that I am now awake, although I'm not sure why, and since I am awake, it is probably as good a time as any to eat a little something."  And together, they proceeded into the kitchen to gather neccesary tools and ingredients.


Eliott went to the bottom drawer, were he kept his best yellow plastic form and his fine set of Melissa and Doug wooden cookware.  He pulled out his largest stock pot and put the fork in.  "I think this pot is too big.  If I try and cook something in this pot, I could put my hand into the hot ingredients and burn it."  Tossing the pot aside (where it banged into the refrigerator), he went back to the drawer.  This time he pulled out a slightly smaller pot and this time, when he placed his best yellow plastic fork inside, the top of the fork was clearly visable above the rim.  "Excellent, now I shall not burn my hand when stirring the hot ingredients."


Fergus concurred with another snuffely sort of snort.  "One does have to be careful with one's fingers around hot ingredients" he stated while turning round the other direction to look at his tail.


"Now that we have the proper tools, we need to find the propper ingredients.  And although I am a toddler of an Independent Sort, I am rather short and cannot reach the cupboards.  I am sure that is where Father keeps all the ingredients.


Fergus yawned loudly, wondering if they would actually eat anything before it was time for his fourth nap of the morning.  "What we need Elliott, is a recipe".


"I already tried that Fergus, and it did not relieve the rumbling."


"That is the wrong sort of pee Elliott"


"Oh, I see" said Elliott, although he really didn't.  "And where would we get a recipe?"


"Your father keeps them up there, on the shelf next to the ingredients."


"Oh, I see" Elliott said excitedly and this time he really could.  "But how shall we get one?  I am still rather short and you lack opposable thumbs."


Fergus thought Elliott seemed concerned and sought to reassure him.  "We don't need one of your father's recipes.  As a Basst with very refined taste, I happen to have have memorized some of my own favorites, which I will share with you.  Now, since you pointed out my lack of thumbs, I'll ask that you follow me.  I will lead you to the ingredients we need, and you can pick them up and put them in the pot."


"Well, that sounds fine, Fergus.  This is working out very well indeed."  And then he followed Fergus through the kitchen.


Stopping in front of the cabinet that contained the waste bucket, Fergus sniffed.  Then he licked.  "As I suspected.  This is a piece of butter wrapping paper.  If you would be so kind Elliott."  Elliot was kind and placed the butter wrapping paper into the pot.


And in front of the desk, Fergus found some dog kibble that his keen senses had failed to detect the night before.  "And these please."  A stop under the table revealed some bits of oatmeal from the morning's breakfast.  They also found a grape (minus one bite) and some pieces of apple skin)  And the doormat gave up a clump of fine cat hair as well as some bits of bark and pine needles.  Elliott cheerfully put all in the pot.


Fergus put his nose down into the pot and sniffed earnestly several times.  "This recipe calls for one more ingredient Elliott."  Elliott shrugged his shoulders happily, waiting for instruction, but glad to be learning so much about recipes from his friend.


Fergus continued to search for the last ingredient, while Elliott followed behind, ready with thumbs and pot and fork.  At the boot tray, they found it.  "This Elliott, is a lady bug, and a lady bug is the Key Ingredient in this recipe."


Elliott tried to pick up the lady bug, but it scrambled away in a decidely unladylike fashion.  Fergus uttered a short growl followed by a sharp bark.  "Oftentimes it is neccessary to stun the lady bug before adding it to the pot Elliott.  Especially when they don't want to be a Key Ingredient".


Working Very Quickly, Elliott added the stunned bug who was the Key Ingedient to the pot.


"Now Elliott, You must stir vigorously.  Elliott liked to stir.  Very much in fact.  Stirring, and causing a stir were specialties of his.  "Okaaaaay!" he squealed.


Fergus watched for a moment and then gave Elliott an "Arrrooooooo" of approval.


"Do you think it's ready now Fergus?"  Elliott had been stirring vigorously for five seconds which is a very long time to a toddler, even one of an Independent Sort.


"Let me try some" Fergus said and Elliott offered him the yellow fork.  After licking it several times, he said "Mmmmm, yes, it's ready.  Now you try some."


Elliott was quite glad to try some and found that it did indeed relieve the rumbling somewhere between his head and toes.  "Does this recipe have a name Fergus?"


"Oh yes"  said Fergus.  "This is my Uncle's recipe for Bugswick Stew.  He is a Somewhat Smellier Basset Hound, who became quite famous in the south after he created this recipe."


"Well I can see why, it really is quite something delicious.  Do you think we should give some to Father?"


Fergus, a bit tired after putting his keen senses to work was ready to begin his fourth nap of the morning.  "Yes, I think you should" he said sleepily.  "I'm sure he would enjoy it and would thank you and congratulate you on having such refined taste for a toddler of an Independent Sort."